I was awaken not by distress; rather, by the sense of a new life emerging.
Since last writing on this blog, I have received a deeper meaning of what it is to let go and let God. I have learned that sometimes the blessings in store can be far greater than anything one can ever conceive for one's own life.
Since my last post, I have watched my beautiful daughter overcome seemingly incredible odds by still existing near the top of her class with a 4.0 at a new and academically challenging school. I have watched her pass AP exams and receive unsolicited literature from Yale, Princeton and Rice University. I have seen her take the lead as president of her school's multicultural club and be unanimously chosen as her senior class homeroom representative.
I have been blessed with a wonderful man in my life who asks me to marry him everyday. We have finally compromised on pre-marital counseling.
I have stumbled upon countless new found opportunities taking my professional career in a new direction I could have never imagined on my own.
It's nice to have tears of joy. I think I'm finally emerging on the other side of the pain. The sun is rising in my life and for all of this, I am thankful for a God Who continues to keep promises if we just continue to believe.
Allow me this opportunity to apologize for not posting for some time. It has been a whirlwind of a time.
I want to say thank you to each and every reader of this blog. You have laid witness to my emotional voyeuristic tendencies. Most time it was without judgement, although I am well aware that my musings were not always politically correct.
I have engaged in much introspection over the last couple of weeks. My life over the last six years has been through a series of crises, disappointments and perceived failures that would have taken out most people. Yet, I arise one more day to the fact that I am still here.
Previously, I have alluded that the massive economic downturn being experienced these days is nothing more than the re-set button being set on all of our lives. We can have the courage to move forward or to die emotionally and psychologically where we are. For most, it is a choice that is solely ours.
For those of you who have not been regular followers of this blog, I started this blog for the purpose of healing. My anger was misplaced pain, resulting from gross frustration and an immense desire to be understood as it is for many women - particularly Black women. There is goodness within. It just came to a point that I felt that every time I attempted to demonstrate or share that goodness, life was kicking me in the teeth one time too many.
I committed myself to spiritual honesty and integral truth. I cannot fake it. I cannot be someone whom I am not, nor do I want to be. I have paid an enormous price for this choice. Yet, it is a choice I still do not regret - in spite of the pain.
I will be taking a break from blogging for a while. Don't get me wrong. I haven't given up on the blog or writing. It's just that the time has come to engage in the next chapter of my life. It has almost been a year since I endured the unthinkable, however, I have learned more than ever that I am a survivor and in a million ways, my journey is just beginning.
What I have gotten most from this blog is the value of loving oneself right where one is...the good, the bad and the ugly. I have struggled to get back to the person I know myself to be. By nature I am loving, kind, generous, smart, compassionate and forgiving. However, we live in a world that will test our resolve in relation to such quality in an effort to make you as ugly as it sometimes can be. Overtime, anger and frustration began to take its toll and I lived, moved and achieved out of fear and not out of love. I have committed myself to a life of doing things out of love.
I do not have all the answers, nor have I reached the ultimate state of enlightenment. Yet, I am confident I am well on my way.
I know that I am loved and that I am blessed. I know that I am to live my life with passion and courage with a faith and trust that only is required of those who are called to a purpose beyond normal human comprehension.
The next year will be crucial as I prepare to send my only baby girl out into the world. I am convinced I am the most blessed parent in the world. If there was only one thing I would be forced to name that I've done right, it would be her.
Feel free to continue to post comments. I will continue to check periodically, yet I will not be posting for some time. I appreciate your patience, understanding and support in this regard. I will answer comments though.
I encourage you to be strong and hold on to your faith. God is always with us even though there are times we may not feel like it. Embrace the peace of God that does exist and surrender to living in the now, in this moment. When life gets ready, it has a way of showing us that we are not always in control. However, it is in these moments we can turn to the Christ consciousness that let's us know we do have the power to arise. We may just need to go through a wilderness experience prior to our spiritual resurrection.
WASHINGTON (Reuters) - President Barack Obama's choice of Sonia Sotomayor to join the U.S. Supreme Court will generate a sharp political battle in the Senate over her liberal positions but she is likely to prevail.
Sotomayor's selection would do little to change the court's 5-4 conservative majority as she replaces another liberal. Republicans promised to her give her respectful, rigorous scrutiny during the summer months.
She would be the first Hispanic and second woman on the high court, and fulfills Obama's objective of choosing someone without a privileged background, given that she grew up in a housing project in the Bronx in New York City.
* If confirmed by the Senate, she would replace the retiring David Souter, who was a reliable liberal vote for the court's minority.
Souter was known as "Bush's mistake," because he was far more liberal than the Republican President George H. W. Bush realized when he chose him.
Obama's choice was evidence that he did not intend to make the same mistake, since Sotomayor, unlike Souter, has staked out fairly liberal positions on many issues.
Does this mean we'll be celebrating Puerto Rican Day Parades at the White House? I sure hope so. I'm truly digging the new flavor of America's melting pot.
Alright all. It's the Friday before Memorial Day. Feeling good after a great week. I'm in the process of finding out more about this Obama impersonator. If anyone has any info, please share. I think his stuff is comedic genius.
